Ladies of the nightWink and arouse your manhood?Best chop off your balls.Let me introduce you to the man who shot the man who shot Abraham Lincoln, folks.Thomas H Corbett was born in London in 1832, later moving to New York at the tender age of eight. Unfortunately, he went with the profession of 'hatter', which... … Continue reading Boston Corbett Haiku
Category: Non-fiction
The Attempted Assassination of William Seward
Bones crushed by horses, Stabbed in face by actor's goon, Still not president. It is often forgotten that Mr Lincoln's unfortunate interaction with John Wilkes Booth was not the only shit going down on April 14, 1865. Particularly, that one of Booth's cronies had a go at Secretary of State William Seward. (Another goon was … Continue reading The Attempted Assassination of William Seward
Five Prime Ministers, Five Years Haiku
Old? Popular? Great! But maybe have an heir in Mind when you drop dead. One of the benefits of the Westminster system of government is that it can survive five heads of government in five years more or less intact. The downside is that it makes such scenarios much more possible. Such was the case … Continue reading Five Prime Ministers, Five Years Haiku
Mona Parsons Haiku
Pros of nun schooling - Skills to stay so cool before Nazi judge, death stalled. You might have inferred from my post about my dear Grandpa Ivan that beneath the plaid exterior of the Nova Scotian man potentially lies the heart of a badass. Turns out, that applies to the women too. Mona Louise Parsons … Continue reading Mona Parsons Haiku
Poor Me Haiku
Brain fuzzed with sickness, Temper frayed by punk students. At least I've sleep? Pah. I haven't any cheese, so I'll keep the whine short. I've been sick with a bad cold lately, and while I'm mostly better, there's that residual cotton ball feeling in my skull that dulls my thinking. Also, sleep's been elusive, I … Continue reading Poor Me Haiku
Sweating Sickness Haiku
You think you're hot shit? Too bad weird mystery plagues Don't give a sweet damn. I've been sick as a dog lately. I've been miserable as fuck. Be that as it may, my knowledge of history has helped me acknowledge that welp, it could be worse. For example, I don't have to worry about a … Continue reading Sweating Sickness Haiku
Buffy Haiku
Maybe it's just me, But sun shines brighter now that I've my Girl Friday. I know updates have been thin on the ground lately, what with Nanowrimo (not that I got much usable material out of it), my parents visiting, and insert sob writer story here. Happily, everything will be better now that I have … Continue reading Buffy Haiku
Miss Veedol Haiku
Get it right first time! Or Imperial Japan Will shut that shit down. My parents are going to be flying over to Taiwan to visit me in mere hours, so here's a short piece that's vaguely related. On October 5, 1931, residents of East Wenatchee, Washington had the privilege of having the Miss Veedol crash … Continue reading Miss Veedol Haiku
Victoria, Princess Royal
A draft of this uploaded before. This was a glitch. It was not meant to happen. Enjoy the completed post. Is it Prussian Court Or pit of hissing vipers? Same thing. Run, Vicky! Victoria, Princess Royal, and Empress of Germany for a hot second, could have averted some bad shit that happened in the 20th … Continue reading Victoria, Princess Royal
George Brown Haiku
Always known drunkard Would wind up the death of him, Shocked it's not John A. It is a truth universally acknowledged by Canadian historians that if you were an anglophone of any note in 19th century Canada, there was an even chance you were a Scot. George Brown (Father of Confederation, founder of the Toronto … Continue reading George Brown Haiku
Kelsey Ehler, AKA The Great Kelsini 