Art by me, Kelsey Ehler. Use with permission. It is a fact that the Coast Salish people weave some kickin' rad wool textiles, but you might wonder how they developed the art without any sheep around. The answer to this, along with a number of life's problems, is 'dogs'. In this case, the Salish Wool … Continue reading The Salish Wool Dog
Category: Non-fiction
Kelsey and Five First Ladies Walk Into a Bar
Photo by Chris F on Pexels.com As Abigail Adams once said, "Remember the ladies," and indeed, I have. As a companion piece to my previous post, Kelsey and Five Presidents Walk Into a Bar, I present my thoughts on which First Ladies would be the best to throw down with me. Again, the chosen few … Continue reading Kelsey and Five First Ladies Walk Into a Bar
Kelsey and Five Presidents Walk Into a Bar
Photo by Chris F on Pexels.com Many presidents and presidential candidates are judged on whether it'd be nice to have a beer with them. This is a shallow and worthless metric. The real question is: "Who do I want by my side in a bar fight?" I've considered the matter thoroughly and I have my … Continue reading Kelsey and Five Presidents Walk Into a Bar
Nancy Wake Haiku
French trees bear such fruit - Sweet to see, will judo-chop You in goddamned neck. This post is written in the honour of my Piper and Jason's newest addition to their family, who shares the same birthday as today's subject. May she prove as badass. As we all should know by now, World War II … Continue reading Nancy Wake Haiku
Canadian Election 2019 Prediction
As all Canadians are aware and no one else, an election is nigh! Hide your children, hide your spouse! (Unless they are sensible, educated voters.) My nation, be thankful, for I will tell you exactly how it will go. On October 21st, the polite, maple-scented masses will head off to their voting stations, as dictated … Continue reading Canadian Election 2019 Prediction
Abigail Adams Haiku
Voted 'First Lady Least Likely to Put Up With Your Anti-Vax Shit.' Once upon a time, there was a disease called 'smallpox.' This smallpox was a son of a bitch, with a 30% mortality rate. And if you survived it? There was a pretty danged good chance you'd be scarred terribly as a permanent reminder … Continue reading Abigail Adams Haiku
Blanche Monnier Haiku
Shame of poor marriage? Or shame of starving daughter, Jailing her? Tough one. I don't normally do trigger warnings, but this post warrants one. Also, do not do an image search for Blanche Monnier unless you're keen for nightmare fuel. Once upon a time, in Poitiers, France in 1876, there lived a beautiful debutante (although … Continue reading Blanche Monnier Haiku
Robert Smalls Haiku
See his smiling face! Of course he's happy enslaved! ... Shit, he stole our boat. History is so full of badass escapes from slavery that it's hard to pick the most badass, but Robert Smalls' escape has to be in the running. Why? Let Lonely Island give you a hint. Smalls was born in South … Continue reading Robert Smalls Haiku
Boston Corbett Haiku
Ladies of the nightWink and arouse your manhood?Best chop off your balls.Let me introduce you to the man who shot the man who shot Abraham Lincoln, folks.Thomas H Corbett was born in London in 1832, later moving to New York at the tender age of eight. Unfortunately, he went with the profession of 'hatter', which... … Continue reading Boston Corbett Haiku