I Return! 100-Word Short Stories!

You thought I was dead. You were wrong.

Here are three 100-word short stories, prompts provided by readers on Facebook. I’m doing this again tomorrow, so feel free to lob me a prompt by 11 PM Taipei Standard Time. And if you like what I do, throw me a tip via PayPal.

The ultrasound had been clear enough; the genetic testing results were clearer still. Ashley and James were expecting a Super Baby. Preparations ensued.
James stroked his beard, contemplating the plastic baby-proofing devices. “Junior’s going to tear through these like butter. How about coating these with some Ultranite? That’ll take the power levels down a notch, right?”
“Dude,” said Ashley. “Ultranite’s going to be literally poison to them. NO. Let’s get a Doctor Strange-type to ward the cupboards instead.”
To this, James agreed.
Ashley eventually birthed a strapping super baby boy. Alas, her preparations didn’t take breastfeeding into account.

When Hester looked back, she had to admit the signs were all there. The outdated facial hair. The constant scrutinizing of pennies. The theater phobia. But it wasn’t until she saw his brilliant speech to the PTA that she knew for sure.
“You’re Abraham Lincoln, brought back to life,” she said to her gangly father. “Admit it.”
“Yes,” said Abraham Lincoln.
“Why don’t you run for president, then?”
“I would, but I’m afraid that they would never accept your mother, Marilyn Monroe, as First Lady.”
“Then, can you help me organize my campaign for student council president?”
“Easy as pie.”

Ralphie was a small dog with a big heart. He woke up one morning, ready to have a good day.
It started off well. He opened his eyes, finding himself snuggled against the First Best Human. Then he was let into the backyard, where he peed upon things.
As the day progressed, he enjoyed walkies, belly rubs, and shaking a plushie repeatedly with his fangs. Splendid!
In the evening, he watched TV alongside the Second Best Human, with his head rested upon the Other Dog. Later, he fell asleep, again snuggled against the First Best Human.
Definitely a good day.

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