Leopold I Haiku

"Albert, my nephew, Listen! To seduce a queen, Flash her some sweet leg." Leopold of Saxe-Coburg-Saalfeld was crowned the very first King of Belgium 187 years ago today. In the other timeline, he was the King, or probably Prince Consort, of England. He was born in 1790 in one of the many German duchies that … Continue reading Leopold I Haiku

Grand Duchess Elizabeth Feodorovna Haiku

Rules for happy life - Do not wed a Romanov, Don't stand near mine shafts. Grand Duchess Elizabeth Feodorovna was killed a hundred years ago today, a day after her little sister, Empress Alexandra, was shot up in an Ekaterinaburg cellar with husband, children, servants, and dog. Somehow, Elizabeth's end managed to be even worse. … Continue reading Grand Duchess Elizabeth Feodorovna Haiku

Madame de Brinvilliers Haiku

Sure, kill family For sweet cash, but try not to Kill in same damned way. You know, let's continue with this 'decapitated ladies' theme we've sort of got going here. This time, our subject wasn't motivated by any motivation higher than 'I want money and fuck my family.' Marie-Madeleine-Marguerite d'Aubray, marquise de Brinvilliers (1630-1676) had … Continue reading Madame de Brinvilliers Haiku

Charlotte Corday Haiku

Don't stab fanatics, Ladies, lest you're guillotined, Called 'mannish', 'ugly.' Charlotte Corday stabbed Jean-Paul Marat 225 ago, making for the least relaxing bath ever. It was 1793. The French Revolution was in full swing and the radical Jacobin faction was in control. An important part of the Jacobin platform was 'let's kill everyone who disagrees … Continue reading Charlotte Corday Haiku