My sweet little girl Won't so much as shit in peace Until she is queen The grown woman you see here is Victoria, Duchess of Kent and Strathearn. The adorable poppet is the future Queen Victoria, blissfully unaware of the infuriating eighteen years she's in for. How frustrating? Having to sleep in the same damned … Continue reading Victoria, Duchess of Kent Haiku
Month: June 2018
Operation Barbarossa Haiku
Europe is all ours! Let's poke giant, insane bear To seal success. The Nazi Invasion of the Soviet Union, codenamed Operation Barbarossa, was launched this day 77 years ago. Anyone who thinks Adolf Hitler was some sort of military genius should have this thrown in their face repeatedly. Why? Oh, let's see. Most of western … Continue reading Operation Barbarossa Haiku
Martine Bertereau Haiku
Gal finds all the mines. Call her witch, throw her in clink In case she wants cash. Martine Bertereau, Baroness de Beausoleil, lived roughly around 1600-1642 in France. She was a mining engineer and mineralogist, and with her mining expert husband Jean de Chastelet, she located over 150 potential mines. She published reports explaining their … Continue reading Martine Bertereau Haiku
Werner von Braun Haiku
Ruskies have rockets! Can avuncular Nazi Save us...? How awkward. Werner von Braun and his team were approved to be shipped to the US under Operation Paperclip 73 years ago today because the US government reeeeaaallly wanted rockets, especially if the Russians had them, and they didn't much care who gave them to them. While … Continue reading Werner von Braun Haiku
Roanoke Colony Haiku
Murder? Aliens? Or went to bang hot neighbors? Deathless mystery. English colonists skedaddled from the first attempted Roanoke colony 432 years ago today,accepting Sir Francis Drake's offer to get the hell out of there. Another, more famous attempt to found a colony in that location followed shortly thereafter. THAT one disappeared after they sent Governor … Continue reading Roanoke Colony Haiku
Anastasia Haiku
Hell of a hat trick! Entered cellar, family shot, stabbed, Became a legion. Grand Duchess Anastasia Nikolaevna was born 117 years ago today and yes, she was murdered in that cellar in Yekaterinburg by the Bolshevik secret police in 1918. Even before the DNA evidence was discovered, well... The rest of her family, along with … Continue reading Anastasia Haiku
Father’s Day Haiku
So much bullshit you've Dealt with from your brats, we should Call you 'Hercules'. Love you, pa. Heart! (Protip: to clear out the bullshit, try redirecting a river. It's the Herculean way.) If you liked the haiku, or would like to request one on a specific topic, please consider sharing the blog, or making a … Continue reading Father’s Day Haiku
