Thomas Jefferson Haiku

Moral and brave to

Liberate one’s slaves, but ah!

Shit with cash. Too bad!

I don’t think you should get credit for being anti-slavery if you don’t free your slaves because, “oops, blew tons cash I didn’t have in Paris, gonna need you guys to keep working for free for me in a sisyphean effort to pay that shit off, excuse me while I go bang my dead wife’s enslaved teenage half-sister.” Call me a curmudgeon.

I know it’s questionable to judge historical figures by the standards of today. But Jefferson knew slavery was evil, yet kept it going on Monticello because… well… He really wanted those books, wine, fancy furniture, etc.

What the shit, dude.

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